I am pretty aware that Nate Smith is a very common name. I've met several Nate Smiths in my day and heard of many more. I was sitting around the other day being extremely vain when I began to wonder where I ranked amongst all the other Nate Smiths in the world. I went to school with a Nate Smith and he was a total tool. So I know I got him beat. But how many other Nate Smiths am I better than? How many of them are better than me? I've decided to find out in a segment I call "Best Nate Smith Ever!"
The first Nate Smith that I will do battle with is definitely a formidable opponent. In fact I already know that I'm going to lose this one. First of all, he is the very first name that comes up when you search for "Nate Smith" on google. I don't show up until halfway down page 8 of that search.
So I clicked on his link and it takes me to his personal site, Fire-Arts.com . Right on the front page is a picture of a giant ball of fire! This man makes art out of fiery explosions! One of the links says "Fire Vortex" and if you click on it you can see pictures of him creating these giant swirly pillars of fire. Meanwhile my fireplace has an on/off switch!
Then, if you go to his bio you will see a picture of Nate Smith. Right off the bat I can see two areas where he has me beat.
First of all, he has a goatee. He can grow real facial hair! I have to photoshop my mustache on. But secondly, he looks totally bad ass in a bandana. He looks like a pirate! A fire pirate! When I wear a bandana, I look like a chemo patient, and not the cool kind of chemo patient.
So this Nate Smith is clearly cooler than me. But as if that wasn't enough, I contacted him about this contest and here is his reply:
life isn't a competition. Be true to yourself Nate. Then there won't be
any reason to compare one Nate Smith with another. You are the best Nate
Smith that is just like you. Remember this always. You are really
incredible actually. Stick to developing yourself and your self expression
and someday you may beat me out of the google match. But at that time,
you won't care about being on top because your reward will be being
Good luck with your life Nate Smith, I hope someday to google myself and
have you appear.
You're welcome to include me in your blog. If you still have the desire
Not only is he cooler than me, he's a lot less shallow than me, and he's so wise! Unfortunately, I can't take his advice. Not because it isn't good advice, but because I never take good advice when it is given to me. I guess in a way I am being true to myself by not taking his advice and am therefore actually taking his advice, which in turn means I am no longer being true to myself. Okay a vein in my head just popped.
The point is, Fire Pirate Nate Smith wins. My first match was a failure and I'll have to put this one in the loss column. Good game, both Nate Smiths played hard.
If your name is Nate Smith and you think you are the "Best Nate Smith Ever!" send me an e-mail at email@example.com .