Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Best Nate Smith Ever! Part 5

Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls! Put your helmets on because it is time for another exciting edition of BEST NATE SMITH EVER! Today's challenger comes from Chico, California, which is Spanish for Boy, California. He sells homes for a living and goes by the name Real Estate Nate. Is he a better Nate Smith than me??? Let's find out!

First of all he is the first Asian Nate Smith I have ever come across. That's pretty cool. Maybe he's a real estate agent by day, and a ninja by night!!! I know, I know...assuming that he is an awesome ninja purely because of his race is stereotyping him and politically incorrect. But c'mon, I said he was a ninja, which is one of the coolest things ever! It's not like I said, "how come there isn't a camera around his neck?" or "woah, if you see this guy on the road, watch out!"

Now, Nate didn't answer my e-mail asking him to participate willingly in this contest. Probably because he's too busy selling houses. Or maybe it's because he really is a ninja and ninjas don't answer e-mails. They just kill you in your sleep. That's how they let you know they got your message. Taking that into consideration, I don't think I'm going to sleep for the next few nights, just in case.

I have no real evidence that Nate is a ninja, but if he is, saying that I am better than him would be a real taboo. Ninjas have pretty big egos. If I were to say that I am better than Real Estate Nate, he would most likely kill me. But he wouldn't just kill me. He would first sell me a house, one that is way out of my price range, and then kill me in it on the day that the deal closed. That would be costly and deadly. A double whammy. So I'm going to go ahead and say that this Nate Smith is indeed better than me. Not because I believe it, but because I value my life (which I secretly think is better than his).

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