Monday, November 06, 2006

Sea Horse Blog

Okay, I've been getting a little bitter lately and it's really been building up so I need to get this off my chest. There was a time when I was respected and widely regarded as one of the most magical creatures in the world. But these days, I am just not feeling the love. Sure, the Unicorn is pretty damned magical, so magical no one has ever even seen one. I concede. I mean, one might say that Unicorns don't actually exist. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying, it'd help their case a lot if they showed up once in a while. Nevertheless, Unicorns are the most magical creature ever. Fine. But lately some other animals have been getting some mention and it just doesn't make any sense. PANDA BEARS? Who in the hell decided that Panda Bears are magical? They're just bears! What's their magic power? Eating Bamboo sticks? Congratufrickinlations! You're a living wood chipper.

You want magic? I'll give you some magic. Did you know that male Sea Horses are the ones that get pregnant? That's right. Sea Horses are the Arnold Schwarzenegger of the animal world. What do I gotta do to get a little respect around here? Run for Governor? Do I need to grow a horn in the middle of my head and become Sea Unicorn? Is that what it's going to take to get you guys to give me a little magical respect? C'mon people! I'm a friggin' horse, in the friggin' sea! And if you can't appreciate that, well then maybe I need to pull my own little Unicorn stunt and disappear for a while. Maybe then you'll learn to have a little gratitude for the whimsical nature that I possess.


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