Wednesday, October 25, 2006

10 Easy Halloween Costumes

Hey kids! Halloween is right around the corner. Most of you probably have not figured out your costume yet because you're incredibly lazy, and even though you'll think about it 10 or 12 more times between now and the big night, you still won't get your act together. Slacker. But don't worry. Here are 10 easy costume ideas that are still scary and fun.

  1. Hooker: Instead of saying "Trick or Treat!" you can just say "Trick!"
  2. Nudist Zombie: Just be sure to keep your candy bag at waist level.
  3. Salmonella Man: Take mom's chicken out of the freezer, let it thaw for an afternoon. Then if the little old lady doesn't give you some candy, give her a salmonella slap.
  4. Clumsy Clyde: Nothing scares a homeowner like a lawsuit because someone got injured on their property. Run around their yard and pretend to get injured. They'll give you all the candy they have if you just get off their property.
  5. Sexual Offender: They're scary, but they look just like everyone else.
  6. Ghost of a Ku Klux Klan Member: You'll need one big white sheet, and one small white sheet.
  7. Homeless Guy: Make a cardboard sign that says "Will Trick for Treat."
  8. Child Actor in Horror Film: Are you 12? Are you pale? According to Hollywood you are terrifying.
  9. Mel Gibson with Tourettes: All you need is a good Australian accent and a list of anti-Semitic words.
  10. A Public Service Announcement: Go to each door and say "I'm the product of too much alcohol and unprotected sex." Now that's scary.
Like these costume ideas? Send me a picture of them in action and I'll give you a treat.


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