Ham Sandwich Blog

I've been in the fridge for three days now. I really hope I get eaten soon because I'm growing some mold and I don't want to be thrown in the trash. Hopefully Dave doesn't look too closely when he picks me up. And now I've got competition because Dave just put some extra slices of pizza in here this morning. They have been real punks. They think Dave likes them more. But Dave made me with his own two hands. Dave and I have a history. He doesn't know anything about those pizza slices. He doesn't have anything invested in them. They were just delivered to him. I am Dave's creation.

When I first got here the Milk was real friendly. We had a lot of good talks about life and relationships. But since I got here the Milk has gone bad. I guess that's what happens when you get old.

Okay, Dave just came and took the two slices of pizza! What the hell Dave! I thought we had a connection! I thought I meant something to you. Am I just a piece of meat between two slices of wonderbread? Huh? Just for that, I'm going to grow out a long moldy fu manchu, and you can manchu on that! I hate you Dave!